First to fight God, then to hold to God with new faith

Genesis 32:1-32
Jacob also went on his way, and the angels of God met him. When Jacob saw them, he said, “This is the camp of God!” So he named that place Mahanaim. Mahanaim means two camps.
In great fear and distress Jacob divided the people who were with him into two groups, and the flocks and herds and camels as well. He thought, “If Esau comes and attacks one group, the group that is left may escape.
Then Jacob prayed, I am unworthy of all the kindness and faithfulness you have shown your servant. I had only my staff when I crossed this Jordan, but now I have become two camps. Save me, I pray, from the hand of my brother Esau, for I am afraid he will come and attack me, and also the mothers with their children. But you have said, ‘I will surely make you prosper and will make your descendants like the sand of the sea, which cannot be counted.
So Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him till daybreak. When the man saw that he could not overpower him, he touched the socket of Jacob’s hip so that his hip was wrenched as he wrestled with the man. Then the man said, “Let me go, for it is daybreak."
But Jacob replied, “I will not let you go unless you bless me.”
Then the man said, “Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because you have struggled with God and with humans and have overcome. Israel probably means he struggles with God.
So Jacob called the place Peniel, saying, “It is because I saw God face to face, and yet my life was spared.” Peniel means face of God.
Although Esau has settled in Seir in the far south, the meeting between the two brothers is inevitable. The news that Esau is coming at speed, and with a force, strikes terror into Jacob. This time, though, he plans and prays.
Alone, and sleepless, Jacob's lifetime struggle against God culminates(達到高潮) in this stage wrestling-bout. He is neither the first nor the last, in some crisis, first to fight God, then to hold to God with new faith. Jacob emerges from the encounter crippled, but a new man. The next altar he erects will not be to the God of his fathers, but to God, the God of Israel'
Why?
Jacob's lifetime is struggled against God and makes strategy in his way to grasp something. But after 20 years of exile, he has family and properties. Jacob knew God's blessing but fear his brother and still struggle with the Lord. After wresting-bout with God, he is changed, he held to God with new faith.
His name was changed from Jacob to Israel and it is the name of his nation and people. This is the promise of the Lord gave to Abraham.
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1. 雅各兩次不知往那裏去，神都向他顯現。在他什麼事都不能做時，即去拉班路上和回迦南地的擔憂害怕中。神總是在人最需要的時候出現來保護。
2. 雅各還是很不放心。對他僕人交待，稱呼以掃為主人，自己為僕人。放棄當初以欺騙方式取得的長子身份。以掃帶400人來，以致雅各擔心、進行安排，同時禱告神。依據神的應許來禱告。禱告後還是沒有安心，而在挑禮物，分為三組，以表達善意。
3.讓家人都先過河，打發所有的都過去。只有自己留下來。他做了很妥善的安排，也知道神的應許，但是他還是不放心。因為他害怕。神以摔蛟來改變他，雅各的性格不易改，非常聰明，好勝。一切都無法平息他的恐懼。
神用拉班來對付他，用不正當方法。如果性格不改變，屬靈生命不改變，以後還是犯錯誤。神與雅名摔蛟來改變，表示他很難改變。大腿窩如果廢了，也就站不住了。最自恃的地方，就是最軟弱的地方。最後只能緊緊抓住對方。將名字改掉，讓他知道他的天然力改變，變缺乏。神沒有讓雅各有十八般武藝面對面以掃，只要抓著神就好了。我們是否願意被神改變。改變是我們最大的祝福。程式最得意可能是學歷、家庭、工作、才華。我們什麼都不好也是一種自視高，讓神很難改變。神會給我們重重一擊，讓我們改變。求神讓我們放下來，改變我們，面對次日的麻煩。讓我們放下一切，緊緊抓住神就好了。
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How?
What we should do is pray and listen to the word of the Lord, company with the Lord is the best way. But how? obey his command and pray and listen to God's word with faith.